Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Queen Elizabeth Budget Cuts One


Cutting back is so very hard to do....especially if you’ve lived a lifetime of luxury...or even a laptime of luxury.

With the economy and such, the Queen of England has also had to cut back. The royal buck isn’t stretching as far as it used to.

So what does the phrase “tightening your belt” mean for the Queen? Will Queen E have to fire the Palace Chef and hire Chef Boyardee? Turn in her Bentley for a Beetle? Drink Ginger Ale instead of Gin?

Even though the Queen is cutting back...by cutting corners...she’s not exactly cutting coupons. She still has servants. But a few less. The plan is to cut back her staff of 1400 royal servants.

So that means saying goodbye to the royal piper who plays every morning under her window to gently wake her. Now she’ll have to kill her annoying alarm clock with a baseball bat like the rest of us. And the man with the job of “Official Swan Counter”...is now toast...or English crumpets. And instead of replacing her leaky roof...she’ll have to patch it. This might not sound like much. But for a Queen...these are royally mounting sacrifices.

Queen E might want to think about getting her Heinyness over to Target for some plastic buckets. I know it might seem to her like a pain in the royal ascot...but it rains a lot in England...and I think her roof is going on 3 centuries old.

Anywhoooooooooo.................................

The budget cuts do have an upside: when Queen E is entertaining and cuts the cheese...it will be less pungent. Her new cut will probably be more of a mild American processed cheese...not as aromatic.

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