Friday, June 4, 2010

Day 46 - Still Spilling


It’s Day 46…and oil is still gushing into the Gulf of Mexico at a rate of 5,000 barrels a day. You would have thought that we could have solved this problem by now. 6 weeks is a lot of time. According to Women’s Day Magazine, I could have made a total body transformation for the beach season in 6 weeks…and that is not an easy task either.

In President Obama’s attempt to look like he is doing something (yes, I’m Republican…don’t hold that against me…I do like the Pres’s winning smile) Obama authorized the Attorney General to launch a criminal investigation into the events that led up to the explosion of the oil rig. Okay. Obama wants an explanation, investigation, interrogation. Whatever. Let’s first get the oil spill to stop spilling and point fingers later.

Thousands of Americans have submitted their ideas for stopping the oil leak. We all want to help…and some ideas are more useful than others.

There was Hoda Kotb who offered her giant tampon idea to soak up the oil. Very absorbent idea, Hoda woman. Then Kevin Costner (who was once around water in his movie Waterworld) came up with a device that removes oil from water. The device didn’t seem to work, but then again neither have his latest movies.

But the BIG name to offer his help and meet with engineers and scientists in Washington, DC was James Cameron. Cameron has expertise with filming underwater and using watercraft technologies in the Titanic and The Abyss. At least his movies worked and weren’t totally underwater. Cameron’s movies make a lot of money…so Washington people probably figured he must know something…about something.

Anywho………..

I still claim that the perfect solution involves a MacGyver resolution. That guy could solve any problem with duct tape, paper clips, a ball-point pen, and a Swiss army knife. In order to fix this problem we need to ask ourselves “What would MacGyver do?”

I have to get Obama on the line and tell him to think MacGyver style…and forget about the engineer, scientist, and movie director approaches. And to remind him to not look at the oil spill with the 3D glasses Cameron gave him...it will look even scarier.

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