Thursday, August 27, 2009

Wisdomless

I’m sitting in the waiting room of the oral surgeon; waiting on patient, Colinboy. His 4 impacted wisdom teeth are coming out. By hook or by crook…he will be wisdom less before the hour is out.

“Impacted” sounds so serious. I first thought “impacted” meant that the wisdom teeth were buried in bone and the surgeon would need a construction size drill and buzz saw to get the suckers out. Now I’m finding out… “impacted” means that the wisdom teeth have failed to emerge fully in its expected position. (Enough with the dental terms, Kat.) Okay I admit I’m not an oral surgeon…I just play one in my blog.

Colinboy is an unwilling patient. He got out of this procedure once before…but he is NOT outsmarting me this time. Although, I wouldn’t be surprised to see him bust down the office doors any minute now. He googled “general anesthesia” and knows every risk and complication that comes with it. He’s probably told the nurses he has swine flu and is extremely contagious.

Before I go painstakingly further…(a toothache is less painful)…I have a juicy question I must sink my incisors, canines and molars in: “Why are the only teeth we have called “Wisdom Teeth”…the ones that routinely need to come out?” Were we not meant to be filled with wisdom?

So Colinboy finally parted with his impacted wisdom teeth. After he came to…I found him sitting in the chair with a blank look. I got close to my boy and touched his leg…that’s when he made a LOUD roar…giving me a heart attack...then said… “just kidding, mom.” jk?

As we walked down the hallway to leave the office…the nurse put a hand on Colinboy to steady him…that’s when Colinboy tripped…and caught himself before he fell flat on his face. Actually, COLIN PRETENDED LIKE HE TRIPPED…giving the nurse a heart attack…then said… “just kidding, nurse.” jk?

I’m not sure having your wisdom teeth removed is a wise move…at least not for Colinboy. It seems the removal can make you both idiotic and wisdomless!

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