Freegan

Have you ever heard of a Freegan? I hadn’t until I saw Oprah. The Oprah Show and People Magazine…the source of my enormous wealth of knowledge and the reason people confuse me with Stephen Hawking.

A Freegan sounds like someone who gets stuff for free….and that’s exactly what they do. They do not beg…they are not begging Freegans. They go to dumpsters near bakeries and grocery stores and take the food that has been thrown out. You would be amazed at what perfectly good food they find there. Fruit with just a small bruise, bags of salad, canned vegetables…bagels. These people are doctors, engineers, and lawyers and believe in the philosophy of anti-consumerism. They have money and could pay…like me the other day….......

I was at Carvel…I am not a Freegan so I didn’t scrape ice cream out of one of their dumpsters. I went in expecting to pay, but realized that I didn’t have a dollar on me. (I don’t understand why they wouldn’t take debit cards.) A woman saw me rummaging through my empty wallet and offered me a five dollar bill. I respectfully said, “Oh, that’s so nice of you…thanks anyway.” She kept insisting. So what did I do? I took that five spot and got myself a medium twist in a cone...thank you very much. (Thinking back…maybe I should have ordered a small one.) I felt funny taking the money. (I didn’t keep the change from her five…I am not that much of a cheap-sKATe.

I understand why a person would want to save the earth and all, but I find it hard to understand how someone could pick through a dumpster of messy food and trash. I have a hard enough time picking through the racks and racks of stuff at T.J. Maxx.

But for some reason, I don’t find it hard to pan handle a few bucks off a total stranger for a Carvel medium twist ice cream cone.